the psych ward

patient 1 (male): “i hear voices. my landlord’s out to get me because i slept with him and now he thinks he controls my life. i like orientals. i once dated a half japanese half filipino girl. i like your dress.”

patient 2 (male): “have you ever seen an anatomy book? do you know everything in it? can you name everything now? you don’t know anything! you’re only qualified to look in eyes and ears… and you’re going to be 26 and a doctor.” [stands up] “i’m sorry, i was sitting down.” [starts crying] “i’m sorry!” [walks away]

patient 3 (female): manic female who proceeds to smile and wave at me during the entire session. “what’s a nephrologist? OOH!”

patient 2 (again): “hey baby girl! come over here, i wanna talk nice to you!”

patient 2 (again): “i like oriental girls. are you married? i like meeting all of the beautiful women here.”

patient 4 (male): “i’ve never had a girlfriend. i’m a virgin, and i’m not embarrased to say it. i don’t discriminate. if i were to fall in love with an african american, asian, hispanic girl it would be ok.” [stares at us during the entire group session.] repeats, “i don’t discriminate. i’ve never had a girlfriend.”

last day tomorrow!

One Response to “the psych ward”

  1. odie Says:

    Hmm, certainly an interesting bunch. would be funnier if you were further away.

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